Christian Counseling - Homosexuality & Christian Attitudes

Christians, gays, homosexuals--if you want to stir up strong emotions and conflicting attitudes on American soil, these words, breathed in the same sentence, can surpass expectations.


Like many of those of the conservative persuasion, for biblical reasons, I don't agree with the gay lifestyle or the loose reasoning that their sexual orientation is only the result of biology. I find it offensive when they misuse scripture to support the idea that God accepts homosexuality and suggest if Christians were loving and tolerant, we would do the same.


Yet, I must say I am disturbed by and sometimes ashamed of Christians who belittle, discount and then discard homosexual people, or any other group for that matter. Just because they don't share our beliefs or choices and some of them regard us as enemies and belittle us with comments (sometimes truthfully), such as: homophobic, judgmental and prejudicial, doesn't give Christians just cause to detest and treat them as enemies. That kind of thinking was prevalent in Old Testament times--love your neighbor and hate your enemy.


In the New Testament, Jesus corrects the idea of hating your enemy by speaking some strange and difficult words, '"But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you"' (Luke 6:27,28). This concept is not for the faint-hearted, those who still drink milk or people who are so easily offended and angered by injustice that they lose perspective of mercy, grace, inherent respect, rights, etc.

Christians should take a leadership position and model agape love (an action or decision-based love, not a feeling). That activist love can be very tough to express toward antagonists, but it is His will. Why would He ask such a thing? Because genuine love has the power to move the heart and spirit of a human being like no other force can, and not just the heart of the other person, but ours as the giver.

This love is not a weak, passive, doormat kind of love, it is strong and assertive and accompanies some serious boundaries. It courageously stands up for the truth and righteousness. It fervently seeks legal means to protect the definition of marriage as between a man and a woman. It recognizes and willingly defends the rights of all, Christian and gay. It earnestly searches for a moral way to balance upholding righteousness and human rights.



Instead of being afraid of what and who you may not know (a gay person), get up-close and personal; put a face and a life to that tag of, "He's a homosexual" or "She's a lesbian." Instead of being dominated by anger at the unrighteousness of their sin, allow yourself to see the whole person. You will discover, they are not so different from us, save their orientation.


A mature Christian "makes even his enemies to be at peace with him" (Proverbs 16:7). This passage doesn't mean we possess all the power to make it happen or are the only ones responsibility for peace. It tells us we should seek, develop and exhibit peace in our relationships; that we should value peace to such an extent that our enemies are stunned by it. This unexpected and sometimes undeserved gift can quiet a storm, generate safety, open up a discussion or, at the least, mutually plant seeds of understanding, which can take root in all of us.